proximoception (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
proximoception) wrote2009-03-31 03:18 am
proximoception) wrote2009-03-31 03:18 am
(no subject)
For a while I was outraged that no one had explained what it would be like and why it would be like that - I was sure the explanation would have made it different, might not have made "all the difference" but in some contexts any difference, however tiny, is an all. I was right. Their silence sets fire to the arms of the drowning. But they're silent because they're drowning or drowned. To walk is to sink, and they were way ahead of me.
And who have I told? Some - but people react to such things as they do to confessions of terrible crimes. With silence: that silence of there's you and then there's them (or the silence that tries to make it so). Which is just what you weren't trying to tell them.
I almost ask why the solution is feared so much worse than the problem, but know that that's exactly what you'd expect to see in any world more than a day old. Things you could bear to fix already have been.
And who have I told? Some - but people react to such things as they do to confessions of terrible crimes. With silence: that silence of there's you and then there's them (or the silence that tries to make it so). Which is just what you weren't trying to tell them.
I almost ask why the solution is feared so much worse than the problem, but know that that's exactly what you'd expect to see in any world more than a day old. Things you could bear to fix already have been.
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Another is, I no longer speak to you because I find it really upsetting, upsetting such that I don't feel stable about the interaction, and so would like to avoid it for the sake of embarrassment, my own, other people's, maybe yours. So: I don't know how I feel, and I don't want other people to see.
And then the other two combinations, one of which is pretty Courtney Love. How will I feel? Let's go out in public and find out!
I've gotten together a pretty good head of the first (I'm not talking to you! I want you to know it's because you ____!) on my own, but find it nearly impossible to maintain in company. In company, usually all I can think is, communication is really difficult. And: good lord, how do any of us survive?
Not rhetorical: What's you icon?
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