(no subject)

[proximoception]

Things I'm afraid of:

Falling
Loss of control
Vomit
Debts
Not hearing things
Repetition
Car crashes
Being worthless
Public speaking
Being wrong

Comments

[proximoception.livejournal.com]

Yeah, humiliation. I guess that's everyone's biggest one, at the end of the day? Even sociopaths and performance artists can't love it.

To the extent this list is at all atypical, now that I look at it, it's because of my partial deafness. All the little tactical problems arising in 30 years of social situations distill to a primal sense of having missed something. I wonder if James was spurred by something similar.

Vomit is so...alien. You sort of see why Sartre picked it, though I don't think it's the true face of things. Maybe their second face...some of the outrageousness comes from suddenly having to use routes, muscles, valves, whatever's in there--that had been empty or dormant for ages previously. I'm not this jerking bladder, this isn't me! That kind of thought. That's the awful thing about Having Missed Something too, I guess: if the world isn't what you thought it was, then who the hell are *you*?