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Jan. 16th, 2017 12:23 amI am scared to touch you, and scared to remember that I have touched you if I do, and scared that I will not remember touching you, and scared that you are scared that I will touch you, will be touching you, will have touched you, or that you will either remember or forget my having touched you, or that I am so scared.
Only once touching you do I become scared I'm touching you wrong, the prospect of touching you at all having consumed all my attention. And this is for the best. The fear behind the touch, stuck back in the dark by the bone, won't touch the touch, and the newborn fear about how is as weak as the smallest baby: if somehow I manage to touch you the touch won't be so bad.
Which I'll see and you'll see and we'll each see that the other sees, and it will then be on record there's something okay about this. Which is great, as nothing is as dangerous as people who don't touch.
Only once touching you do I become scared I'm touching you wrong, the prospect of touching you at all having consumed all my attention. And this is for the best. The fear behind the touch, stuck back in the dark by the bone, won't touch the touch, and the newborn fear about how is as weak as the smallest baby: if somehow I manage to touch you the touch won't be so bad.
Which I'll see and you'll see and we'll each see that the other sees, and it will then be on record there's something okay about this. Which is great, as nothing is as dangerous as people who don't touch.
