proximoception | (no subject)

(no subject)

With all my sleep problems before I didn't have REM bubbles popped one to three times per night.

I'd been wondering how it was going. Great sympathy and improbable wishes on the sleep score.

Back at you.

When the time comes, don't forget to Ferberize. At five-six months. First time parents think it's wrong, on the whole. But it's not: it's the best favor you can do your kid: teaching her how to fall and stay asleep herself. It's a hard two or three nights, and then it's like you gave her a piece of heaven that will last her whole childhood, maybe her whole life.

Seriously. This is where advice is most resented by parents, but most urgently insisted on by their friends. And the friends are right.

I'm pro-Ferber, my neurosciencey wife isn't. I think the thought of Maddy crying is what's motivating her, but she argues the issue a level or two beyond me. Trying to sell her on the diluted versions at the moment. For her sake as much as anyone else's.

I know, and I feel that you can wait (have to wait) till December or January. But with both D and J, the absolutely peaceful sleep they achieved the third night, and relatively peaceful sleep of the second, was a vicarious joy. It was just such a pleasure to see them, for the first time in their lives, having the pleasure of sleeping all night.

The sense of anxiety and need that was part of their ferocious insistence on waking up when they were still terribly tired, but unable to be at peace with being at peace: to see that vanish over night was just a fantastic experience.

I am proud of having given them that, if nothing else.

So excellent that you posted this advice while cloaked in a Proust icon.

Va donc avec le petit.

Touche à moi! But Ferberizing occurs at so much younger an age, and obviates the terrors the narrator will feel.

Oh, I know. But I still couldn't help remarking.

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