(no subject)

[proximoception]

Ever have the sneaking suspicion you're a pain in the ass? I'm as confused about the welcome-wearout point as I am about what to tip for takeout food.

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[agoraphiliac.livejournal.com]

In life? In Livejournal?

I think the about obsolescence of friendships, lately. Of particular friendships. A few people have dropped me in my time here in Seattle, and lately I've dropped someone. Or two, two someones. The protocols are much stranger than they are with romantic relationships.

Sometimes people tell me it's something about Seattle; friendship is cheap in Seattle, or whatever. I never know how to respond to generalizations about "this city," have never known, in any city I've lived in. I've lived lots of places, but the only way I could compare would be to have been the same person in all those places. Which I wasn't.

Well, I've discussed this to a fare-thee-well. Fare thee well.

[proximoception.livejournal.com]

As I'm not sure it's happening, I'm not sure where it's happening. Presumably everywhere. This is the pane of your Johari Window (as I recall?) forever dark to you. I get hints now and then that I might be overbearing or rambly or hitting false notes, but it's all ambiguous. I feel guilty at being self-concerned enough to even talk about this; but it has its altruistic aspect too. "World, help me service your needs better by telling me what I'm doing wrong. Very, very delicately though, please."

My fiancee's having similar friend problems. There's a Hazlitt essay addressing this that I'll post some excerpts from presently. She says it's uncannily accurate.