(no subject)

[proximoception]

-- I have seen the sights and heard the music. Nothing was enough.
== You haven't seen and heard everything. Nobody could.
-- A room of props surrounded by mirrors, that is the world. An illusion of endlessness. Repeated flavors, cosmetically distinct ideas, xeroxed personalities and events. On which the ink is fading.
== What presumption. And even supposing it were so, is it not enough? Are you rained from a different sky? Are not your needs also finite?
-- My capacity to judge the world is the measure of my estrangement from it. Experience was but a drop of ink in my ocean of expectation.
== As our Earth is but a dab on the cosmic canvas. But it is the mark that rivets the eye. And the diving eye sees everything within. And indeed an everything of everythings, as every blink redraws the sky.
-- The artist can only do so much with such materials. The paint is but paint. And what is sought cannot be bodied forth in these colors.
== Seek you then in a black non-seeking, fool? Or perhaps in a cake white with borrowed tinges from all colors, a tasteless indigestible unsubstance of bitter reverie?
-- I want the colors that should have been. A promise was made.
== It was not. Your colors exist only in your perverse wilfulness. Seek them there and steep in them to your full content if you cannot be righted by reason.
-- A promise was made. Any lack is a promise.
== Who told you that?
-- No one had to. I am this knowledge. Its birth was my own.
== And what will redress your lack? Which is, I suppose, every lack.
-- Yes.
== Well? Who, then? The maker of the promise? That personage or plurality clearly hasn't so far, and shows no sign of going about it, if of existing at all. And even assuming they were to, wouldn't the fact of their having let any time lapse before keeping their promise
constitute an enduring lack in itself? A gap in the record, dear fool. A box ever exed.
-- The past is itself the lack.
== So the present is your savior?
-- A something in it is.
== A someday? So the future.
-- A thing of which the future's but one bounding line of many.
== Well, I don't see where your expansive friend can fit himself if he's out of time and no part of the world you scorn. Oh, wait, is he you again? You're each void, shadow and absence, by your claim. Nothing got for nothing for its nothingache. At a cost of six nothings the nothing at the nothing store. "Nothing was enough" after all!
-- If I knew exactly what would be enough I would effect it, if I could; or be silent until it occurred, if I could not.
== The world could end before it did occur.
-- I doubt that a world does that. But if so the world would end, and then it would occur.
== Pah! And how do you know this?
-- I am this knowledge also.
== Hold on. You're the knowledge a promise was made and also the knowledge it will be kept? And apparently also the -desire- that it be kept?
-- These are the same. Promises to which we are indifferent are forgotten. Promises we do not know will be kept are not promises.
== Well. Hmm. But surely you can desire for a promise to be kept without having heard of the promise yet? Oh wait, but then you'd have to be aware of the lack the promise was filling, and you were implying before that awareness of a lack is identity with the lack or something, and that a lack is itself a promise, so... so...
-- Yes.
== Look, fool. You're obviously a human being.
-- Yes, I am.
== Well that's a three dimensional moving thingamajig. Hardly a lack of any kind, though there's some holes and deficiencies.
-- My lips are me and not me, and speak my thoughts. I am the void and not the void. I am the translation of its desire.
== That reminds me of the Christian Trinity nonsense.
-- I'm where they got that from.
== Are you also the maker of the promise and its means of completion? That would fit the trinity better. King and messenger of change and means of change. With the event of change and desired changedness as prospective fourth and fifth members. Though I suppose you could collapse them into one and say they're just the ground where the trisected hero is standing and label that heaven. Or collapse all the other temporary agents into that and you have one endlessly long, endlessly wide strip of silver astroturf eternally rolling up into itself in a self-respectful hug.
-- This mockery does something for you?
== Fills a little lack I have that keeps reopening. But I'm also sharpening a point or two. Notice how the longer we talk the more you back yourself out of space, time, identity, relevance and a sense of humor.
-- I'm where I always was.
== And where is that? You say you're x seeking y from a stingy z, but you look like your average a who doesn't have enough b but can't be bothered to stand in line for it at c like the rest of us. You admit yourself the world was enough for you once. Maybe all that's happened is you feel you're no longer enough for -it-?
-- Is there a difference? It and I do not fit, but I fit nothing else. Which I know to be impossible and hence untrue. And since I know I am not an impostor the world must be.
== I'm suggesting there are actions you could be taking to better fit yourself, rather than pursuing this freestyle revisionist theologizing to no happy end.
-- I know what you're suggesting. You wish me to pare down my desire to fit the meager available objects. I cannot.
== I think you'll find that once in the thick of things your desires will alter of themselves. And not a single one will be unmeetable.
-- When have I ever been out of the thick of things? What desire could ever abide change? Who has ever lived whose every desire was met?
== When have you ever been to the very heart of things? What hope has desire without change? Who has ever lived a day without making compact, although secret, with the world?

(Shared silence.)

Comments

[dritan.livejournal.com]

who are you?

[proximoception.livejournal.com]

These aren't actual people. They're something like Freud's erotic and death drives, or Blake's prolific and devouring principles, or simple ambition and skepticism. Mythographs of voices in anyone's head.

[dritan.livejournal.com]

Please!!! Who do you think I am? You see the same question.. and again how did occure to you(with all due respect) to think that I asked for the characters, the essential difference between the notion of infinity and that of the unidentified is something you could find in any intellectual conversation of the last 25 centuries, is idiotic to be unable to dont see that(as a sorrow or a play depends on the author and the degree of irony he possesses), and I might be everything but not an idiot.In my opinion or better..listen if I was an pointillist or surrealist I could have managed to represent a cow with dots or some triangles and spheres but this doesn't mean I can do some roasts with it. So.. Who are you?
No I'm not offended at all

[dritan.livejournal.com]

For the above:I'm so sorry for the mistakes.. I wrote with increasing speed...and because it can be misunderstood: The sentences with the words idiotic and idiot were related only with my personae and weren't suggesting anything to anyone except me...Thank-you

[proximoception.livejournal.com]

I didn't think you were an idiot. I just assumed that, if you have as much trouble with my English as I sometimes have with yours, you might have been led to think this was a transcription of an actual dialogue. Or had understood fine that it was an imaginary dialogue, but wondered whether I had invested myself particularly in one of the two voices.

As for who I concretely am, my name is Steve and I'm a North American. That's about all there is to know and all I care to tell here.

[dritan.livejournal.com]

ok...I didn't assume anything related to what you might have thought of me, what most probably creates resolvable problems is the way(I'm not calling it style) I write. It will be perhaps boring and most certainly incongruous to explain why. I kindly ask your absolution if I have offended you in anyway because that wasn't by no means my intention. I come from a completely different culture...that's the way we talk to people we know and I'm sorry to have used it. I like the way you write, an event very uncommon to me, I just thought,(if you would like to)that we can comunicate through you journal, time to time. When I asked who you are it had nothing to do with your civic status but what you think of yourself in terms of writing because this is how you present yourself, by writing i wanted to know if you had publish anything, silly of me to have not specified...I sincerely wish for you the best...and you already now my name and nationality and I live in North-America while still being an weird Albanian

[proximoception.livejournal.com]

Thank you for the compliment; and don't worry, you haven't been at all offensive at any point.